Controversial new building design wins £18m contract
Before: The derelict teaching complex in Byers' Way. An "eyesore".
After: Lord Crooke's challenging vision which won his firm the
Leading architect Lord Damien Crooke has been awarded the £18m contract to
design and build the new University "Centre of Excellence in Management Studies"
which is to replace the derelict and dangerous teaching complex in Byers' Way,
described by the local press as an eyesore.
Lord Crooke's futuristic design has caused outrage in the local area due to its
similarity to a large canine faeces. Speaking at a press conference yesterday
he explained the thinking behind the design:
"Obviously this is not the final design, but merely a digital-sketch which
encompasses the essence of the final work - without actually frightening people
with a final design-plan, which quite frankly would not be understandable by
"The form of the design is an ironic reference to a comment made by Prince
Charles about architects 'who leave a turd in every plaza'.
"Of course we expect resistance from people at first, all challenging ideas
take a while for people to get used to. I'm sure that other great geniuses in
the past, Picasso, Monet, DaVinci to name but three, had the same
problems when they first unveiled their works."
Indeed, there was so much resistance from local people and university staff
that the press conference had to be attended by Riot Police in order to
protect Lord Crooke and Professor Dubious. One member of University Staff
and shortly after dismissed, after continually shouting protests.
Professor Dubious angrily refuted the comments saying "Lord Crooke and his
architectural firm 'Brassneck and Crooke' are very well respected in the
industry and it is frankly insulting to claim that he is 'simply taking the
piss' with his revolutionary vision. As a forward thinking university we
strongly feel that it is our duty to challenge convention and thus enrich
the lives of our staff, students and the local people."